How many times have you been in a conversation, and really related to what the other person was saying? Have you interrupted in your excitement? Have you instantly started talking about your own experience? We can often empathise and sympathise with friends, and want to let they know they are not alone and we understand. However, one-upmanship can come across as rude and arrogant.
When you start to feel the urge to interrupt, follow this rule – ask them a question about their situation or topic – listen to the answer. Ask them a second question – listen to the answer again. Then you can report – tell them about your experiences or share your thoughts. This will help the other person feel heard, and maximise your empathy. It’s not easy and we mean well. But like all good habits that we want to develop, it takes practice.
I picked this advice in an ADHD forum recently. If you are not already lurking around in FB or Reddit forums I can really recommend it. It’s eye opening to see the range and depth of problems discussed. People tend to be very generous sharing their experiences and offering advice. There are a lot of creative suggestions that can really help us. This is one of those.
